Gideon’s Christmas Wish toy drive is held in memory of a forever two-year-old, bright eyed, energetic little boy named Gideon. He loved trains, cars, and having adventures with his cousins. Most importantly, Gideon loved Jesus and he knew that Jesus loved him. On May 23, 2022, Gideon was pushing one of his favorite toy trucks while walking with me (his mom) to the mailbox. In the blink of an eye, he was in Jesus’s arms. A car pulled forward out of its parking space and the driver didn’t see Gideon. Our worst day was Gideon’s best day – he got to see Jesus face to face.

Some of the Cook Children’s ER staff asked if they could hold their annual Christmas toy drive in Gideon’s honor. Thus, Gideon’s Christmas Wish began. Our mission is to bring smiles, laughter, and hope to children and their families who are hurting and spending Christmas Eve or Christmas Day in the ER. Gideon’s life was short, but he is still having a big impact. His aunts, uncle, cousins, grandparents, and I all love and miss him so much and we cannot wait to see him again in Heaven.

For more on Gideon’s life and the origins of Gideon’s Christmas Wish, check out: https://redeemedmama.com/gideons-christmas-wish/.

Ways to participate in Gideon’s Christmas Wish.

1. Visit participating business locations to drop off new toys between now and December 20th.
2. Check out this Amazon Wish List for gift ideas. (You do not have to stick to that list of gifts. The ER services children ranging in age from 0-17 with a variety of interests – art, music, sports, princesses, science, etc. Feel free to purchase a gift you think they will enjoy.)
3. If you would like to have a Gideon’s Christmas Wish drop off box at your local school, gym, or business please let me know and I will get you all of the information. 
4. Gifts can be sent to me or directly to: Cook Children’s Emergency Department, 886 6th Ave, Fort Worth, TX 76104 *Make a note that this is for Gideon’s Christmas Wish.

The Impact of Gideon’s Christmas Wish.

Last Christmas Eve, I got to see Gideon’s Christmas Wish in action.

We collected hundreds of toys and brought them to Cook Children’s Emergency Department to be given to kids and their siblings who have to spend Christmas Eve or Christmas day in the ER.

There were a couple toys that arrived after all the other toys had been dropped off. On Christmas Eve, as I stood in the ER lobby waiting to deliver the last of the toys to the nurses, I watched a little child leaving the ER pause to pick out a toy from Gideon’s Christmas Wish before heading out the door. Seeing that interaction brought a huge smile to my face and tears to my eyes.

Moments later, I was met by Nurse Misty who had originally asked if Cook Children’s Emergency Department’s annual toy drive could be held in Gideon’s honor. She told me she had just the child in mind for one of the toys I handed over to her. The toy wasn’t late after all, it had arrived at just the perfect time for that specific patient. That’s God right there!

Nurse Misty lead me around the maze that is the ER and I saw huge boxes overflowing with Gideon’s Christmas Wish toys in every hallway. Multiple Cook Children’s ER staff told me how excited they are to work Christmas Eve and Christmas Day because they get to see the joy on the faces of the children as they hand out toys. It was heartwarming to see the impact of Gideon’s Christmas Wish on the ER staff as well.

The staff said that a child was very distraught earlier that evening because Santa would not be able to find him since the child didn’t have a home and was spending Christmas Eve in the ER. The nurses loaded up that little child with many toys. The child was so excited that he got to have Christmas and wasn’t left out because of his current situation. The mission of Gideon’s Christmas Wish is to bring smiles, laughter, and hope to families who are hurting this Christmas. I’d say we accomplished that mission!

Christmas will always have sorrow mixed into it because Gideon isn’t here. I’m thankful for the opportunity to serve others during this time. It doesn’t take away the pain, but I find joy in knowing we’re having a positive impact on other people experiencing a painful Christmas too. We have been comforted and now it’s our turn to comfort others.

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.” - 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

Thank you all for blessing these families as well as the ER staff and for remembering Gideon this Christmas. 

Let me walk you through the journey of the Prayer Bears donated in memory of Gideon: 

Step 1. Generous donors fill out this form stating the number of Prayer Bears they would like to donate. 

Step 2. Boxes of soft and cuddly teddy bears in different shapes and sizes are ordered and delivered to me.

Step 3. Family and friends help decorate and pray over each box of Prayer Bears. We pray for the children and families who receive the bears, as well as for the hospital staff who deliver them. 

Step 4. The boxes are loaded up to be delivered to the hospital and placed in the Bear Den. 

Step 5. Hospital volunteers add colorful ribbons to each bear. 

Step 6. Prayer Bears are delivered to children who need encouragement or support after a painful procedure, during a lengthy hospital stay, or during difficult times. The hospital chaplains tell children that “this bear comes to you with love from people you have never met who are praying for you.” 

Last year, 1,296 Prayer Bears were donated to the hospital in memory of Gideon. In all of 2024, the hospital gave out over 18,000 Prayer Bears. That averages out to approximately 350 bears per week. Gideon would be five years old, if he were alive today. I would love to be able to provide the hospital with five week’s worth of Prayer Bears – that’s a goal of 1,750 bears this year. 

If you would like to honor Gideon’s memory, you may purchase Prayer Bears for $9.00 each. Please fill out this form to help me keep track. I will order the bears, pray over the boxes with family and friends, and deliver them to the hospital in Gideon’s honor on May 23rd. 

I’ve found serving others in the midst of my grief to be healing. It shifts my focus off of myself and on to other people who are also hurting. I’m thankful for the promise of Psalms 34:18, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Thank you for helping us serve others while honoring Gideon’s life. You’re making a huge difference for so many people. 

Last year was the first year of Gideon’s Christmas Wish and it was a huge success. We placed boxes at local businesses and collected hundreds of toys. Once all of the boxes were collected, we prayed for the children and families who would receive the toys as well as the staff who would hand them out. No one wants to spend the holidays in the ER, so our prayer was that these gifts would bring smiles and hope.

When we pulled up to the ER to drop off the toys, we were greeted by a handful of staff who eagerly helped unload truck loads of boxes. The staff happily gave up their lunch room to sort everything before placing boxes of toys in every hallway of the Emergency Department. 

There was so much joy on the faces of the staff at the sight of these toys. I can only imagine the joy on the faces of the patients. My hope is that the children who receive these gifts will be just as excited as Gideon when he received Thomas the Tank Engine on his final Christmas. 

There are a variety of ways to participate in Gideon’s Christmas Wish this year. 

Thank you all for blessing these families as well as the ER staff and for remembering Gideon this Christmas. 

Psalm 46:1 - God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.

On May 23, 2022, the night Gideon went to heaven, the hospital gave Gideon and his two young cousins a Prayer Bear.  I remember the events so clearly.  Everything happened so quickly that the cousins arrived at the hospital with no essentials (i.e. my nephew was only wearing a diaper). The hospital staff gave him clothes to wear and gave each of the cousins a Prayer Bear. The bears were a comfort to Gideon’s cousins in a time of great need. 

As the one year anniversary of Gideon’s death approached last year in 2023, my family and I thought about different ways to honor Gideon’s life and legacy. Donating Prayer Bears seemed like a wonderful thing to do in his memory. Last year, 1080 Prayer Bears were donated to the hospital in memory of Gideon. The hospital chaplains tell children that “this bear comes to you with love from people you have never met who are praying for you.” We wrote notes and drew pictures on the boxes of bears when they arrived at our garage. Before we loaded up the boxes, we prayed for the children and families who would receive those bears. We also prayed for the hospital staff who would treat the patients. 

I wanted to share what the hospital team shared after last year’s donation:

“The Prayer Bears you brought to us were of all shapes and sizes, and were exactly what we needed to help sustain the Prayer Bear program during the summer months – a time when donations typically dip. Upon receipt of your donation, we found ourselves stashing boxes of bears in every nook and cranny of our Bear Den. Finding room for boxes of bears is certainly a wonderful problem for the Prayer Bear program to face!”

In 2023, the hospital gave out a total of 17,329 Prayer Bears to children who need encouragement or support after a painful procedure, a lengthy hospital stay, or during difficult times. That averages out to approximately 333 bears per week. 

We would like to donate Prayer Bears to the hospital in memory of Gideon again this year. If you would like to honor Gideon’s memory,  you may purchase Prayer Bears for $8.00 each. Please fill out this form to help me keep track. I will order the bears, pray over the boxes with family and friends, and deliver them to the hospital in Gideon’s honor. 

Thank you for honoring Gideon’s life. We truly appreciate each and every one of you. Looking forward to seeing Jesus and being reunited with Gideon. In the meantime, I cling to this promise in Revelation 21:4, “And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” 

I realized the first new person I had met was the doctor who cared for Gideon that night in the Emergency Room. This doctor was a complete stranger, yet she played such a role in Gideon’s story. She saw the full extent of his injuries. She was the one who stated Gideon’s time of death and told me my son had died. She heard my cry as she said those words. She hugged me that night and told me “Gideon was instantly with Jesus.” 

I did not want the only image this doctor had of Gideon to be while he was her patient in the ER. I wanted to give her a glimpse into the life of the child she worked so hard to save. I decided to send her a card. In the card, I told her a little bit about Gideon’s personality, what he liked to do, and I included printed pictures of Gideon. I wanted her to be able to see the joyful and vibrant little boy he was. Thus began an unexpected friendship with the doctor who was there for the worst moment of my entire life. 

A couple weeks ago, this doctor and one of the ER nurses asked if they could hold the Cook Children’s Emergency Department’s annual toy drive in Gideon’s honor. I was overcome with emotion. We met for lunch and they explained that they don’t often get to know the children and the families they work so hard to serve. Yet, they had gotten to know Gideon from the stories and pictures I had shared with them. This is how Gideon’s Christmas Wish came about. 

So I wanted to take a moment to tell you more about Gideon since many of you are just learning about his story. 

This is Gideon. He was born on June 25, 2019. He had a big smile and an infectious belly laugh. He loved his family and friends and would include them by name in his nightly prayers. He was protective of his younger cousins and loved playing with them. He was curious and imaginative. He had a really big heart and wanted to make sure everyone was ok. He was very energetic and loved to run around. 

He always had toy cars or trains in both hands. He pushed his bigger cars all around the house and the yard. He loved seeing the hippo at the zoo and had a really funny story involving the hippo relieving himself on the fish swimming around. He said one of his favorite things to do was make chocolate chip cookies with me. His favorite place was the train station and he loved watching trains go by. 

On May 23, 2022, Gideon was happily walking with me to the mailbox. We needed to mail some letters and then we were going to walk to his “favorite place in the whole world” – the train. He was pushing one of his favorite toy trucks. In the blink of an eye, he was in Jesus’s arms. A car pulled forward out of its parking space and the driver didn’t see Gideon. The doctor said he was “instantly with Jesus.” Our worst day was Gideon’s best day – he got to sing Hosanna directly to Jesus. I am looking forward to the day I get to see Gideon again because I know he is in Heaven. 

Cook Children’s Emergency Department is honoring Gideon’s life by giving toys to kids and their siblings who have to spend their holiday season in the ER. Many local businesses have graciously allowed for drop off boxes to be placed at their establishments. 

You can also send toys directly to: Cook Children’s Emergency Department, 886 6th Ave, Fort Worth, TX 76104 *Make a note that this is for Gideon’s Christmas Wish*

I hope this has given you a glimpse of the amazing little boy Gideon was. His life was short, but he is still having a big impact. I am so proud to be his mommy. Thank you for partnering with me in our mission to bring smiles, laughter, and hope to families who are hurting this Christmas.

Mother’s Day 2019

I made the decision to leave DC and go back to California on Mother’s Day weekend. I was thirty-four weeks pregnant at the time. I realized the family I wanted was just an illusion and would not be the healthiest thing for me and my unborn child. That Mother’s Day weekend was the moment I realized I would be a single mom. It was truly the best decision for us, but it was extremely difficult. 

Mother’s Day 2020

The first Mother’s Day after Gideon was born was healing. I loved being Gideon’s mom. I loved that I could hold him and watch him grow and explore. I was getting the hang of being a single mom even though I was so ashamed to identify myself by that title. I was struggling though because our life wasn’t how I imagined it would be. We lived with my parents, I had just stopped working at the job I loved, and we were in covid lockdowns. It was hard, but even with all of that, I was in such a better place than the year before. 

Mother’s Day 2021

I went to a Single Mom Mother’s Day dinner at my church. The support and generosity the church provided toward single mom’s was incredible to witness. I was finally coming to terms with the fact that I was a single mom. I realized I wasn’t failing Gideon, I was giving him the best life I could and he was thriving. Gideon was at such a fun age. He made some crafts for me for Mother’s Day. It finally felt like a good Mother’s Day. 

Mother’s Day 2022

This was the first Mother’s Day I was actually looking forward to. Gideon woke up super early. Aunt Kim brought over donuts and Gideon gave me the gift he made for me at preschool. It was a framed picture with I love you written in chalk. Gideon was the I. We took a nap together and went out for ice cream. It was such a nice and relaxing day. It was my favorite Mother’s Day. That day feels like yesterday. The memories are so vivid. Gideon went to Heaven fifteen days later. 

Mother’s Day 2023

I’m going to be very honest, I don’t even know where to begin with this Mother’s Day. I’m dreading it, I’m numb to it, and I’m not sure how to prepare for it. Do I even count as a mother anymore? I don’t have any other children. No one alive on earth calls me Mom. Now what do I call myself? I always thought the title I would lose was “single” not “mother.” I have been really struggling because I feel like I failed Gideon. It was my job as his mother to protect him and I wasn’t able to do that. This feeling of failure has really caused me to have an identity crisis. I feel like I failed as a mom so maybe I don’t deserve the title of mom anymore. 

These feelings of failure have really intensified over the last few months. A few people have asked how they could pray for me and I told them they could be praying for this Mother’s Day because it is going to be a hard day. I didn’t go into details about all the failure thoughts I have been having. You know what, God answers even the littlest of prayers. I’ve started seeing things about being a good mom despite how I feel. A few friends have sent encouraging words and notes filled with truth. Another friend of mine shared an old status that included the words, “once a momma, always a momma.” Midnight Mom Devotional posted a prayer for the woman who needs to hear she’s a good mom. Grief Share has taught me that motherhood wasn’t my sole identity. It has been a very difficult process, but I’m beginning to understand and discover my new identity. All of those things felt like little reminders that my thoughts of failure are lies that I don’t need to listen to. I am so thankful for my motherhood journey even though it never looked like I imagined. Gideon is an amazing blessing and he changed my life for the better. I am so honored that God chose me to be his mother. 

I believe you become a mother at the moment of conception, not at the birth of your child. When a woman is pregnant, the cells of the baby migrate into the mother’s bloodstream and then circle back into the baby, it’s called fetal-maternal microchimerism.⁠ After the baby is born, many of these cells stay in the mother’s body, leaving a permanent imprint in the mother’s tissues, bones, brain, and skin. Even if a pregnancy doesn’t go to full term or if the mother has an abortion, these cells still migrate into her bloodstream. There is scientific proof that moms carry a little piece of their children with them forever. 

There are also the amazing women who are mothers through adoption, foster care, marriage, or  stepping up when a need arises. You are incredible! You are an amazing example of unconditional and sacrificial love. You are such an important figure and you have a huge role. 

No matter how you became a mom, God picked you to be the mother to your children and he equipped you to do the job. Isaiah 41:10 says, “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” You’re not alone no matter where you are on the motherhood journey: adoptive mom, birth mom, bonus mom, empty nester mom, foster mom, grieving mom, mom who wishes to reconcile with her child, mother who suffered miscarriage(s), NICU mom, pregnant mom, single mom, stay at home mom, teen mom, woman estranged from her mom, woman longing to become a mom, woman who stepped up to fill the role of a mom, working mom. Big hug to all of you this Mother’s Day. Remember, wherever you are right now, this isn’t the end of your story. 

Love,

Redeemed Mama

Introduction

Life is full of choices. I was faced with one of the biggest choices I’ve ever had to make in October 2018. I found out I was pregnant and I had to decide if I was going to keep my baby or have an abortion. 

Every Life Matters

Even though I’m pro-life, the idea of not having to tell my family was compelling. Plus, I was being pressured to have an abortion. I convinced myself that taking the abortion pill was the right thing to do. On the way to Planned Parenthood, I told myself that if they didn’t have the abortion pill that was the sign I needed to keep my baby. Not only did that facility not have the abortion pill, but there wasn’t a facility in a three hour radius that had it. I got out of Planned Parenthood as fast as I could and I called my mom. Her first words after I told her I was pregnant were, “It’s ok. We’re going to get through this.” Immediately, a wave of peace washed over me. I made an appointment at Care Net. My amazing advocate, Shelley, prayed with me and provided support throughout my pregnancy. God’s faithfulness was very evident on that day and that peace I felt stuck with me through my pregnancy. On June 25, 2019, my son, Gideon, was born. He was perfect. I am so thankful God blessed me with such an amazing son.

It’s Not the Length of Time that Makes a Life

Life as a single-mom is difficult. However, it is also filled with so much joy. Gideon resists naps at all costs, is constantly on the go, and is very strong willed. I have no idea where he gets that trait from… You will always find him playing with cars and trains, laughing and sometimes fighting with his cousins, and dancing to Thunderstruck. 

Honestly, our life doesn’t look the way I imagined it would. But thankfully, I have so many people who support me and Gideon. My Dad and my brother-in-law have stepped in to fill the father-figure role in Gideon’s life. Both of my sisters love Gideon like their own. The amazing advocates at Care Net have prayed with me and walked alongside me on my motherhood journey.  It really does take a village and I am so thankful for each and every one of you. 

On May 23, 2022 Gideon and I were walking to the mailbox and he was pushing one of his favorite toy trucks. In the blink of an eye, Gideon was in Jesus’s arms. A car pulled forward out of its parking space and the driver didn’t see Gideon. The doctor said he was “instantly with Jesus.” About an hour before the accident, I told Gideon we should practice the songs for his preschool performance that would have been the next morning. I suggested we sing the Wheels on the Bus, but Gideon said, “No, Mommy. This is the day we sing Hosanna!” And that’s exactly what he got to do about an hour later – sing hosanna directly to Jesus. 

Gideon’s Legacy

Even though Gideon’s life on earth was short, I am so thankful that I got to be his Mommy. If I had gone through with having an abortion, I would have probably grieved his death alone or maybe with a handful of other people. But since I chose to give Gideon life, his life continues to touch so many people. Gideon was the embodiment of joy and he loved Jesus with all of his heart. So while this hurts more than anything I have ever experienced, I have hope-filled grief because I know I will be with Jesus and Gideon one day in Heaven.

Life is both hard and joyful. It’s full of laughter and tears. But even a short life still has meaning. I know God will continue to use Gideon’s life in more ways than I could ever imagine. God has been faithful even in the midst of this immense pain. On the Friday before the accident, my sister and I both listened to Lee Strobel on Family Talk. He was discussing his new book A Case for Heaven. I was so intrigued by what he said that I downloaded his book right then and there. God was already providing resources even before the accident because He knew my family and I were going to need them. 

Closing

I am clinging to the fact that God has been faithful in the past so I know He will be faithful in the future. Even though I have no idea what that looks like. I’m comforted by John 13:7 – Jesus replied, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.”

When I imagined how I would react if something terrible happened, I pictured a lot of tears. I had seen and spoken to people who lost loved ones. They all spoke about days, weeks, months even, of crying everyday. There is a popular quote from Jamie Anderson that reads, “Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow party of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.” Reading that quote hurt so much. Tears are normal. Tears are expected. I didn’t have the tears the quote talks about. Why didn’t I have tears? 

My mind started to run down a dark path. If I really loved Gideon, I would cry. Maybe all those people who are crying love Gideon more than I do. Tears are the only way people would know how much I’m hurting. I must be broken. 

A neighbor bought us a book called Tear Soup by Pat Schwiebert and Chuck DeKlyen. The next day, someone sent us a package that included another copy of Tear Soup. Clearly, we needed to read this book. The premise of the book is that grief looks different for each person. There is no formula or step-by-step instruction manual. Grief is personal. I needed that reminder. My grief isn’t wrong simply because it looks different. 

I love talking about Gideon and I love when other people talk about Gideon. It’s normal and natural and fun for me to take those trips down memory lane. There are other people who do not want to talk about the person who passed away. Other people have said traveling and taking time away was exactly what they needed.  I wasn’t ready to travel far from my home and not be where Gideon lived.  Some people want to sleep all day, but I have trouble falling and staying asleep. I’m choosing to find the joy in doing things Gideon loved even though it hurts. Some people don’t want to do things their loved one did because it hurts. 

It’s been almost four months now since Gideon went to Heaven. My tears have returned at times. Other times I have a lump in my throat, but the tears won’t fall from my eyes. I’ve come to welcome my tears when they come, but I don’t get too hard on myself when they don’t. 

“For everything there is a season . . . a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance”

Ecclesiastes 3: 1 & 4

Family started arriving from out of town and a few of them stayed with me. Obviously, I hadn’t planned on having company, so nothing was ready. Sheets needed to be washed and beds needed to be made, bathrooms needed to be cleaned, and laundry needed to be done so there were enough fresh towels. I only had six sets of dishes and there were more than six people. I wasn’t planning on having so many extra mouths to feed so a trip to the grocery store was needed. Nothing out of the ordinary or particularly difficult, but everyone in my family was grieving and didn’t have capacity to do it. And that was just the practical stuff. 

I spoke to the medical examiner’s office about what needed to be done since an autopsy needed to be performed. I received a call asking if I would be willing to donate Gideon’s corneas and/or heart valves. They had a series of questions for me that needed to be answered about medical history. I knew that I needed to start planning a service to celebrate Gideon’s life. It was all very overwhelming. I was so numb, but I was also in get-it-done mode. I had a checklist of things that needed to happen and an order in which each task needed to be completed. Suddenly, my whole focus went into planning Gideon’s service. 

While we were still at the hospital the night Gideon died, I remember the hospital chaplain asking me if there was a church she could notify on my behalf. I didn’t give her an answer. I remember thinking this was just something my family and I were going to have to get through on our own (clearly I was not fully grasping what had just happened). When we arrived home that night, a couple from the church I attend met us at my home. Utterly exhausted, I was already asleep, but the couple brought dinner and some sleeping aid they had picked up at the local grocery store, just in case. They prayed with my sister and brother-in-law and said they would return the next day to help me with planning the service. We had no idea how the church was notified, but that couple showing up for us that night was such a blessing. It was our greatest time of need and it was foolish to think we could handle it alone. Little did I know that was just the beginning of people showing up for us. 

The next day friends, neighbors, coworkers, and even strangers showered us with blessings. People brought hot meals and so many groceries that not only my fridge, but also my sister’s fridge, and a neighbor’s freezer were completely packed. People brought paper products like plates, utensils, tissues, and towel papers because they knew a lot of people would be coming into town and the last thing we needed to worry about was all of that. People came and cleaned my house and my sister’s house. People took care of the yardwork and the plants. People set up meal trains and donated to help cover medical bills and the funeral cost. People prayed for us and sent encouraging texts and cards. People helped me figure out funeral arrangements. People made memorials to honor Gideon. People sent flowers and other beautiful things and our house looked and smelled beautiful. And so, so much more. 

I am honestly still completely in awe of how much love and support we received and continue to receive. People used their unique talents and abilities to be there for us in our greatest time of need. That is how the body of Christ is supposed to work. I didn’t know what I needed in those first few days and I still don’t know exactly what I need at times today. People surveyed the situation and filled the needs they saw. In time, it occurred to me that grief is a marathon and people need help at different times along the way, not just at the very beginning. Consequently, I have greatly appreciated the people who have made it known that they are there for me for the long haul. 

Being the recipient of so much support got me thinking about how I’ve shown up for people in their time of need. I realized I had some people I needed to apologize to because I wasn’t there for them like I should have been. Maybe you, like me, have thought it’s so hard because no one knows what to do in difficult situations like this. I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t know what to say or do sometimes, so I end up saying or doing nothing. I don’t want to make it uncomfortable, so sometimes I pull away and just pretend like it didn’t happen. I’ve realized that I don’t want to do that anymore. Yes, it’s hard and yes, no one knows what to say, but I still want to show up. I’ve come to realize that it’s ok to say there are no words and there is no action that makes it better. (Many, many of you sent messages with the first sentence:  “I just don’t know what to say ….” and truthfully, I don’t either.)  I’m beginning to grasp that what matters is that I’m there and I’m going to serve them in a way that I can whether that is something tangible (like a gift, card, a scripture verse, etc.), giving a monetary donation, or actually praying for that person. I know I won’t always get it right, but my goal is to do better in this area. 

My newsfeed has been full of people who are hurting. There has been a lot of death, disease, and suffering lately. Each time I login to social media, I’m seeing posts about friends of mine that are grieving. Maybe you’re seeing a lot more of that, too. I wanted to share a list of ways to show up for the people in our lives who are hurting. This isn’t an exhaustive list by any means, but maybe it will help you with some ideas. 

Ways to help:

• Bring food/groceries
• Bring paper products like plates, utensils,cups, toilet paper, paper towels, tissues, etc
• Bring air mattresses and bedding for extra house guests
• Show up and clean/do laundry
• Do yard work/gardening 
• Run errands 
• Send or bring physical copies of books so they have them for when they’re ready
• Call/text to let them know you’re thinking about them (this means more than you know)
• Share fun memories
• Pray for them (really do it and keep doing it!)
• Share encouraging messages and scripture 
• Just be there! 
• Donate to cover costs of bills and living expenses
• Make travel arrangements 
• Create and organize a meal train or a donation site for them
• Identify yourself as someone being there for them for the long haul if you truly are
• Connect them with people who have similar stories
• Create a memorial of some kind
• Listen and sit in the silence if needed
• Use your unique talent and creativity to show support, whether it’s art, writing, hospitality, organization, listening, hugging, tech skills, etc.
• And finally, consider this:
  • Is there a way to help a different member of the family who is also grieving, but might be getting overlooked? 

We aren’t meant to get through hard times alone and I would even contend we can’t get through hard times alone. We need each other. So, ask for help if you need it. Receive help when you need it. Be there and help when someone else needs it. 

I pray these thoughts will help inspire you to identify how you can assist the next time you’re in a situation to help someone who is hurting. 

Thank you again to everyone who has helped me and my family in so many ways. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

Love, 

Brittany

“Whenever you are able, do good to people who need help.” – Proverbs 3:27

“Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people . . .” – Galatians 6:10

There are no words. 

This past month, my family and I have experienced the body of Christ at work in overwhelming ways. All I can say is thank you: 

• Thank you to the people who came running outside and called 911. 
• Thank you to the man who started praying over us and tried to check for vital signs. 
• Thank you to the lady who stood with her back against my back, holding me upright so I wouldn’t crumble to the ground as I cradled Gideon and waited for the first responders. 
• Thank you to the first responders. Gideon would have thought all of the action was the coolest thing – I just never imagined all of the action would be for us. 
• Thank you to the paramedics for working so rapidly. 
• Thank you to the neighbors who helped get Mozzie (the dog) back into the apartment. 
• Thank you to my brother-in-law, Landon, for driving me to the hospital. 
• Thank you to the ER trauma team who worked so tirelessly. I appreciate you trying to comfort us during the worst moment of our lives.
• Thank you to my sisters, Kim and Mikkaela. You have always been there for me in my greatest times of need. 
• Thank you to the friends who said they were family so they could get into the hospital to be with us and stayed with Tesley and Elias (Kim and Landon’s children) in the other room. 
• Thank you to Milestone Church. You sent people who met us with food and sleeping medicine when we got home from the hospital. You have walked by us each step of the way and continue to go above and beyond. 
• Thank you to all of those who have prayed and continue praying for us. Your prayers are being answered and are greatly appreciated. I feel like I’m a walking answer to prayer. 
• Thank you to everyone who donated financially, brought food and necessities, cleaned bathrooms and kitchens, did yard work, and so many other things I don’t even know about. 
• Thank you to those who sent flowers, cards, and gifts. These thoughtful pieces help fill the room with joy during these moments of sorrow.
• Thank you to Legacy Church and Legacy Church MOPS for blessing me and my family.
• Thank you to the people who paid for my parents and my brother’s family to come here so we could all be together during this difficult time. 
• Thank you to the friends and family near and far who traveled to be with us. We love each and every one of you beyond measure. 
• Thank you to the neighbors who showered us with love and support. 
• Thank you to everyone who helped make Gideon’s celebration of life so beautiful. 
• Thank you to Bruce for making a beautiful urn. It is truly a work of art and it is so special knowing it was made with love. 
• Thank you to everyone who has been so supportive. We appreciate you checking in on us, offering up opportunities to come visit, and all of your words of encouragement. Please always feel free to reach out to us. 
• Thank you to each of our employers who were generous with time off work. 
• Thank you to everyone who continues to talk about and share memories of Gideon. I love that you do this. Please don’t ever stop. 
• Thank you to the strangers who have reached out. I hope I get to meet you one day. 
• Thank you to my amazing family. May God continue to comfort each of you with His peace that surpasses all understanding. 

I know there are so many more people to thank. Each day I’m learning a new part of the story that I didn’t know. Thank you doesn’t even begin to communicate my appreciation to each of you for the important role you’ve played. I just have no other words. 

I know this is not the end of the story. The grave does not get the last word. Jesus is the resurrection and the life. Anyone who believes in Him, though they die, they will live. I am looking forward to the day I get to see Gideon again because I know he’s in Heaven with Jesus. 

If your life changed in the blink of an eye, do you know if you’ll be with Jesus? Don’t wait. You might think you have time, but that’s not guaranteed. Call on the name of Jesus and ask Him to come into your life. It’s that simple. If you need someone to pray with, feel free to reach out to me. 

Love, 

Brittany